The Thoughts and Ponders of a Fire Lady
by LIA777
Summary: Fire Lady Ursa has been pondering about her mother nation for a long time since her banishment. On her way to Ba Sing Se and ultimately a new life, she meets a particular young waterbender, and wonders if perhaps her nation could return to it's former beauty, if she makes a decision that would tip the scale of the War.


**Disclaimer: I do not Avatar: The Last Airbender or any of the characters.**

The Fire Nation used to be a beautiful place. No, not used to – it always was. The forests and small towns were always filled with simple happiness and joy. It was no rare occurrence to see a firebender at his work pausing for a moment to perform tricks to the little children who had stranded off. The children would scream and squeal in delight, clapping the tiny hands until they were led off by their smiling mothers. During all four seasons, the land would always be flourishing with flowers, and during the summer, when the sun was at it's highest; the trees would bear only the sweetest and ripest fruit for the picking of all. During those hot summer nights, if you stepped out of you home for a moment, you could spot the fireflies dancing in the distance or around a lamp, their glowing bodies seeming to represent the fire they so loved.

Even in the large cities and Capital, it was a beautiful nation. The dirt roads and forest would clear away to large buildings and homes, however the flowers and fruit still managed to make their way through the walls. Festivals were a common occurrence, and the center of the Capitol would always be filled with laughter and joy as the citizens, both commoner and noble alike, would dance and enjoy themselves to the fullest. There seemed to be a constant cheer, an eternal happiness in the air that affected all who were near. Even the servants at the palace were happy while doing their jobs. How could they not, when surrounded with such beauty and peace?

Unfortunately however, as with all beautiful things, the time of peace and prosperity came to a bitter end.

It had started with Azulon, with his own thirst for power. Then it went down to his youngest son, the current Fire Lord Ozai. Ever since then, there had been naught but pain and suffering for all who came near . . .

Sometimes, one could not help but wonder, what if –

"Hurry up the line!"

Suddenly a large hand pushed the woman lost within her own thoughts, throwing her off balance so that she fell to the ground in a heap.

"What a clumsy old hag. If you can't even walk without falling then get out of the line and let someone of use take your place!"

Insulted and biting her lip so as to keep any sound from escaping her throat, the dark-haired woman began to rise, when suddenly she felt a small whoosh of air blow past her, and another thud of someone else hitting the ground.

Looking up, the woman saw that there was a girl, no older than fifteen years of age standing before her, wearing undoubtedly water tribe clothing and with a look of anger on her features as she returned the water back into the waterskin at her hip.

_A waterbender,_ the woman realized. Surely enough, glancing behind her she saw a rather large young man crumpled on the ground, the front of his shirt soaked as he groaned in pain.

Looking up once more, the dark haired woman saw that the same waterbender that had attacked the young man was now smiling at her as she extended a hand.

"I'm sorry about that, are you all right?"

The woman on the ground nodded as she accepted the girl's hand, rising from her position on the ground to stand next to the waterbender before her.

"Yes, thank you for your kindness." The woman said, bowing in respect. When the woman looked up again it was to see that the girl before her blushing a vibrant shade of red.

"There is no need to be so formal – it is only the kind thing to do to offer help to someone in need."

_Ah, a noble one,_ the woman noted with a smile. _And quite polite too._

"I still thank you for your trouble, Miss . . ."

"Katara. My name is Katara."

"Well then Katara, it was lovely to meet you. My name is Akina."

The waterbender's smile brightened as she replied. "The pleasure is all mine Akina." Suddenly out of the crowd of people another boy appeared beside Katara, holding her arm with a concerned look on his face.

"There you are Katara. Come on, we're almost at the front of the line. How many times have I told you – oh, hello." It was only then that the young man noticed the older woman's presence.

Quickly evaluating him, Akina noticed that he wore his hair in a ponytail, and he, like the girl whose arm he held, wore water tribe clothing.

Sokka did not know the strange woman standing before him, but he had been taught since young to be polite to those whom he did not yet know. Besides, there was something that made the young warrior pause, and immediately become polite. The woman standing before him was not very tall, with long black hair and a pale complexion, and there was no more than plain, thin clothing and a worn bag to hold her things in on her body. Yet as she stood before him, Sokka felt the need to bow before this woman. Despite the common clothes on her back, the woman stood with the grace and poise of a noble of the highest caliber – but that was impossible! What would a noble be doing in a line of refugees waiting to arrive at Ba Sing Se?

"It appears that your friend needs you. Thank you once more for your help." The woman said to Katara, who smiled in response.

"It seems so. It was lovely meeting you Akina. I hope we meet again!" That was when the boy at her side began to drag her off, muttering something to himself about strange women and late little sisters.

"As do I." Akina answered, raising a hand in goodbye as the girl disappeared into the crowd.

_Such a kind young girl. _The woman hoped that she would cross paths with that girl again.

And so began the long task of waiting in line so that she could enter Ba Sing Se. As she waited, the woman began to become lost in her thoughts once more. The name she had used, Akina, had now become familiar to her, sometimes even more so than her birth name. She had used that name for so long that sometimes she herself forgot that she had another name.

"Ursa." The woman whispered to herself, finally letting herself speak her birth name for the first time since she left her mother nation so many years ago.

The former Fire Lady snapped herself out of her thoughts as she neared the front of the line, making herself remember what she was here for.

_I am here to start a new life. It has been many years since I have been banished, so there are no longer agents searching for my whereabouts. Hopefully, if I live to see the end of this War, I will be able to see my son one last time . . ._

Soon Ursa was at the front of the line, where she encountered a rather stern-looking woman.

"Passport please." She demanded. Ursa froze, somewhat confused.

"Passport?" She repeated, however being raised a noble, she had learned not to let her confusion show on her face.

The woman in front of her raised a critical eyebrow as she spoke. "You do have one, don't you?"

In fact Ursa did have one, however it was of Fire Lady Ursa, not Akina. But even if she could get in as Ursa, she did not have the passport on her, as she had never been asked for it her entire life, being able to travel with her family freely.

The woman shook her head before continuing. "If you don't have a passport, then you don't get into Ba Sing Se. Now move it!"

Realizing that she was not going to get anything out of staying there stubbornly, the former Fire Lady moved aside, sighing as she saw that she had not counted at this part of the journey. So travelling all throughout the Earth Kingdom on foot had all been for nothing. How was she supposed to enter the city and start a new life now?

As she was searching her mind for some other form of entrance, Ursa heard the shouts of some people a short distance from her. Turning around, the former Fire Lady found a small group of refugees, pleading with the same stern lady from before that their passports were stolen.

"Please! Our passports were stolen and my wife is pregnant! Please let us through!"

Ursa felt sympathy go through her body. She knew from experience what tragic things from the outside world could affect one so strongly when carrying a child. With this in mind, the former Fire Lady stepped forward. She could stand being denied herself of entry, however to deny a couple with a child on the way entrance to the city when their passports were stolen was something that she did not believe to be just at all.

"No passports, no entry!" The woman repeated. "Guards!"

"Pardon, but can you not see that this woman is close to giving birth?" Ursa said, appearing beside the people in need of help.

The woman recognized her and frowned.

"You again. I already said that no passports, no entry!"

"Do you have no sympathy for this couple and their growing child? Does such a silly thing as a slip of paper matter more than a life that could very well be lost without being even embraced by their mother if they do not enter the city now?" She said gently.

The woman paused for a moment, her stern mask slipping before she composed herself and continued with the same sternness as before, however this time there was a vein visibly beginning to throb in her forehead as she spoke. "That's the rules! You don't like them; go change them! Until then, no passports, no entry into Ba Sing Se! Guards!"

Two rather large-looking individuals suddenly appeared before them, their muscular forms threatening even to a Fire Lady such as herself.

The group reluctantly left, deciding to walk with dignity rather than being physically manhandled like sacs of rice.

At that moment as another ferry left the port, Ursa was completely unaware that she ahd just been less than a hundred feet away from the son that she had missed dearly for so long.

Zuko turned his head sharply to the left, something having caught his attention out of the corner of his eye.

"Hmm?" Iroh said, noticing his nephew's troubled expression and peering up at him curiously. "Is something wrong, Lee?" he asked, using their code names as they always did in crowded or public areas.

" . . . No. It's nothing Uncle." But it was indeed something. For a single moment, the banished prince had thought to have caught sight of the silhouette of the graceful and elegant being that could only be his mother . . . but of course such a notion was impossible. The former Fire Lady had left many years ago, seeming to disappear off the face of the earth as she left Zuko and his life forever.

_It's probably just the lack of food getting to me._ The prince thought, looking forward once more as he and his Uncle continued on their journey to Ba Sing Se, one step out of many more to come on his road of self-discovery.

Back to Ursa.

"I apologize that you had to go through that. Are you all right?" Ursa asked, looking at a woman that was quite obviously pregnant.

The woman smiled and nodded her head. "Yes, thank you." She replied.

"Yes, thank you for standing up for us before. It's nice to know that there's someone out there that is still willing to help other people, especially in times such as these." The man who had spoken was rather tall, with dark brown hair. Judging by his protective stance around the pregnant woman, his hand unconsciously resting on the large bump on her stomach signified that he was her husband. Behind them was a young woman with black hair who smiled politely. Judging by their clothing, they were earth kingdom refugees.

"It is nothing, really." Ursa said, smiling gently and waving it off elegantly with her dainty hand.

"My name is Tahn, this is my sister, Kira, and my wife, Ying."

"It is nice to meet you. My name is Akina."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Akina. But now the problem is exactly how we get to Ba Sing Se. We can't afford to stay here much longer without putting threat to our baby's birth."

Ursa's face fell in sympathy for the couple in front of her. How horrible would it be, to tell your child that they were born in a public area such as this, in a time where their parents had no home to call their own as they were just two of hundreds of refugees attempting to enter Ba Sing Se.

"The Avatar and his friends!" Kira said suddenly, perking up as she spoke. "Surely he will help us! Look, there they are now!"

Looking in the direction that the girl pointed, Ursa immediately spotted the vibrant yellow and orange colors of the Air Benders. _The Avatar,_ Ursa thought in wonder, following the rest of the group as they walked towards the person indicated before.

As they got close the person wearing the yellow and orange clothing turned, showing his face to the small group as they came closer. Looking at his face, Ursa saw that the savior of the world was nothing more than a young boy. Bewildered for a moment, it took a few seconds for Ursa to evaluate said Avatar.

_He is just a boy. _She thought. As she watched, Ursa could see that despite being the Avatar, the boy before her was full of life and joy, almost like any other boy his age. _A good omen_, she thought, smiling to herself as she turned and left the group as they explained their misfortune to the twelve year old. It was a good thing that the Avatar would be so cheerful, especially in such a time of distress. If those who met him saw that he was so full of hope, then they too would feel the effects of hope fall on their shoulders, bringing them at ease. With that in mind, Ursa turned and began to slip away from the group before her. She had no place there, and seeing the ray of hope against this suffering under the hand of her husband was more than enough to make up for her inability to enter the great city.

"We lost our passports, and then this woman stood up for us!" Tahn said, calling over to the woman who had been attempting to slip away. Turning back at the mention of her person, Ursa smiled gently when she saw a familiar face among so many that she did not recognize.

"Akina!" The young water tribe girl said, her face lighting up in a smile as she recognized the woman from before.

"Katara, what a pleasant surprise." Ursa said in greeting.

"Wait, Katara, you know her?" the Avatar said, appearing at the young girl's side.

"Yes, she's the woman I told you about who had been pushed over by that barbarian in line!"

Ursa chucked at the memory of the large man who had spoken to her in such a manner before. Seeing as that the only image the woman had of him was that of his fallen form on the ground, it truly was a slightly comical thought. _Barbarian indeed,_ Ursa thought.

"Yes, thank you once more for your kindness. I am quite sure that that young man is going to think twice before acting unkindly again."

The young avatar frowned slightly before smiling once more, his actions the epitome of politeness as he addressed the former Fire Lady before him. "Well, it is very nice to meet you, Akina. My name's Aang."

"The pleasure is all mine." Ursa replied, bowing politely as she did before.

This time the young boy was the one to blush, unconsciously mimicking the very actions of the waterbender next to him not so very long ago.

"So, will you be able to go on the ferry?" Katara asked politely, to which the older woman frowned sadly and shook her head.

"It appears that my own passport has been misplaced as well." She replied, using the same excuse that the three – or four, counting the growing child inside one's stomach – other refugees before her had used. May the spirits punish her for lying so, however even if it was the avatar that she was addressing, it would do no good to reveal her true identity now.

"Stupid passport thief!" Ying muttered to herself.

"That's terrible! But all of you need to go to Ba Sing Se." Katara said, her pretty face made into a sad frown. "If only there was a way . . ." she pondered, however the young avatar beside her said the answer before she could finish that thought.

"There is. We're going to go through the Serpent's Pass."

~O~

_Well, this is certainly a strange turn of events._ Ursa thought to herself as she walked behind the avatar and his friends as they walked the distance to the other path that went to the great city of Ba Sing Se.

During the time that they walked, Ursa had been introduced to the rest of the people in the avatar's group. She already knew Katara, and she soon knew Sokka, the water tribe boy from before, Toph, an amazing young girl, confident in her actions despite being blind. Ursa still couldn't get her mind around the fact that the young girl could feel all of their vibrations through her earthbending – it truly was something to behold! Then they met up with a young woman by the name of Suki, who was rather kind, if not a bit obvious in her affections towards Sokka.

It had been many hours of walking along the dangerous terrain of the Serpent's Pass that Ursa, along with the rest of the group, began to feel tired. It was dangerous terrain, with threat of rockslides a constant reminder to be quiet, and the long drop down the cliffs next to you to the water another one to watch your step.

Finally Katara called out for a break as they reached a relatively large area to rest. It was a good thing too, because the light of the sun was beginning to set out in the horizon. They only had a short time left until nightfall. It was rather quick work setting up camp, and now there was already a fire burning so warm them all from the sea breeze's chill.

Ursa gladly sat down, neither caring that she lost some of her grace as she did so, nor the fact that she was going to get her clothing dirty from the dirt and dust around her.

"Tired?"

Ursa looked up and smiled when she saw that there standing before her was none other than Katara.

"Quite. Would you care to join me?" She offered.

"Sure."

The two women chatted for some time, of simple things, of random things, simply getting to know each other.

"So, what do you plan to do upon reaching Ba Sing Se?" Katara asked the woman next to her.

Ursa smiled slightly.

"I plan on finding work as a florist, so I can start working and begin a new life. I have always liked flowers, and I simply hope that arranging bouquets beautifully, some happiness will go to the people who see the flowers." She said, her voice going soft as she imagined all of the beautiful arrays of flowers she could make once arriving at Ba Sing Se.

"That's a beautiful thing to dream of." She commented. The two looked up at the moon, which was shining brightly that night, seeming to bless the two women with its silvery kiss.

"Thank you. I hope you and Sokka a happy marriage." Ursa said after a moment. She turned surprised when she heart Katara splutter beside her. Concerned, the older woman placed a hand on the girl's back, trying to see if she was going to have an attack of some sort.

She was surprised however when she saw a look of utter disgust on the young girl's face. "_Sokka_? You mean my brother?"

A light blush appeared over Ursa's features as she realized her mistake.

"Oh, I apologize. Well, I saw your betrothal necklace, and that you were both water tribe, so I thought – I apologize for the misunderstanding." She said, casting her face down slightly in embarrassment.

Katara on the other hand simply smiled and laughed. "It's fine. Well I guess other people would see it that way I guess. I'm not actually betrothed."

"Oh? But I thought that a necklace meant that you were betrothed? Did I happen to hear wrong?"

"No, a necklace does mean that a woman is betrothed, when from the water tribe. But this necklace wasn't carved for me. It was my grandmother's, who passed it on to my mom, and eventually to me." The young waterbender's face grew somber as she thought about her mother. "It's the only thing I have left of her."

Ursa placed her dainty hand back on Katara's shoulder in a comforting gesture, hoping that some of her sympathy would help soothe the young girl before her. How terrible it was to lose a loved one, especially for one so young.

"I am sorry."

"No, it's fine. It was a long time ago." Katara said, shaking her head and attempting to regain her former cheer. "Well, you kind of remind me of her, in a way." She admitted, her own cheeks growing hot for the second time that day as she glanced at the woman next to her from underneath her lashes. "You're both kind, and you stand up for other people when in need, like you did with Tahn and Ying. You both have this grace about you, and even though you don't look anything alike . . ." Katara's blush deepened and her voice turned into a whisper. " . . . You're both very beautiful."

When the young waterbender received no answer in return her blush deepened even more. What was she doing, practically spilling her guts out and comparing someone who she didn't even know well to her deceased mother? She shouldn't have even mentioned it, and now she had made it awkward for both of them. Looking up from underneath her eyelashes once more, Katara was surprised when she saw that Akina was smiling down at her, almost as a mother would her child.

"Thank you." She said at last, letting her hand linger for a few moments more before she faced forward again, looking back up at the moon. The two continued to sit in silence, before Ursa spoke again, her voice slightly distant as she spoke. "You're also slightly like my son." She commented, another smile gracing her features.

Katara looked over at the woman sitting next to her, suddenly realizing that she must have a son. She must have a family somewhere – the question was why were they separated. But Katara couldn't shake the feeling that the woman before her was speaking of the past. Perhaps it was simply what was called 'woman's intuition.'

"What happened to him?" She asked at last.

"I don't know." Ursa whispered. "I left him many years ago. I had to, in order to keep him from harm's way. But even though I kept on saying that to myself, I still know without a doubt that leaving him behind was the most difficult thing I had to do in my life."

Katara stayed silent as she let Ursa continue to reminisce of her dear child.

"You both are alike in some ways. You're both polite, and kind, and you both care about the feelings and well being of others. One time I received a horrible fever, and was in my bedchamber all day. That day I had promised to take him to go see the festival that was going on around the city. But instead when I got sick, despite the warnings of everyone else about catching the fever himself, he still went on ahead and proclaimed himself my personal little physician, and set himself the task of taking care of my every need." Ursa smiled fondly at the memory. "It's probably something that he doesn't even remember, but I still remember it as vividly as though it happened yesterday. He was also a bit rough around the edges – he was a growing boy after all, barely learning the ways of life in his young age. He had a _horrible_ temper." Ursa laughed as she remembered many instances when her young son cried out defiantly "girls are crazy!" as he stormed off to his room.

"He would always get mad when his little sister pulled pranks on him. One time when he was thrown into a pond as a result of a prank he accidentally hit a turtle duck, and then the mother turtleduck went after him and chased him out of the pond!"

Katara couldn't help but giggle at the image that popped up in her mind of a faceless pale little boy with the black hair of his mother, soaking wet from head to toe as he was chased around by a turtleduck.

"Yes . . . Afterwards he would always cry out 'girls are crazy!' and stamp his foot on the ground, storming off to his room as he ran his hands through his black hair. Always trying to pretend to be a grown up. But even so, he cared about his little sister. He was the one that helped teach her to speak after all."

Katara smiled, her good mood restored as she continued to imagine this boy that she didn't even know, and immediately taking a liking to. He seemed like a kind boy, and she imagined that if she were to meet him, they would soon end up becoming good friends.

"He was handsome too . . . Right now he's seventeen, just a few years older than you, I believe. I think that the two of you would become good friends, if you met . . . What I wouldn't give to see him again." She finished wistfully.

Katara paused, collecting her thoughts as she spoke again.

"From what you've told me about him, I'm sure that you raised a fine young man. He must be glad to have had a mother like you, and I'm sure that he wants to see you as much as you want to see him. Don't lose hope, I know that one day, you'll see him again." She said, smiling and offering comfort to Akina beside her.

Ursa smiled at the words of the waterbender, hoping that those words would be true.

Soon Katara was called off to prepare dinner. Bidding her goodbye, the young waterbender left Ursa alone once more to ponder her thoughts.

_Such a beautiful young girl, _she thought not for the first time that day. Smiling to herself, Ursa began to wonder what would happen if that girl were to become her daughter in law. _That would be wonderful!_ She thought. _Dear little Zuko deserves someone like her . . . who knows, maybe one day they'll meet, and my hopes will come true._

At the thought of her son, Ursa's thoughts immediately turned back to the Fire Nation, a newfound hope within her as she continued to think about her mother nation.

The Fire Nation was a beautiful place. Before the war, it was a place filled with joy and happiness, only made even more beautiful with her children's laughter and simple innocence. Ozai too was not as cruel and power-striven as he was now. He used to be a kind and caring man. Ambitious, and jealous of his older brother, but caring, and quite passionate and loving towards his wife.

_Perhaps it can be beautiful once more, if we can simply end this war._ Ursa thought, new thoughts striking her. Being Fire Lady, she had been allowed to roam through most of the palace. Despite never having entered the war meeting room or other such places, she knew where they were located, and she knew the locations of quite possibly every other room in the palace. The avatar would need such information when facing off her husband and bringing peace to the world. And if he had that information, then the war would end sooner . . . but in order to do that, she would have to reveal her true identity. It was possible that they could cast her out, or that they could leave her alone to felt for herself in such a dangerous terrain.

Was it worth it? _Yes,_ she realized with a start. Yes, it was worth it. It would help bring peace to the world, and the sooner the war ended, then the sooner she could reunite with her son!

She had thought of similar thoughts before, however they had been short and fleeing, and even if she continued to ponder on them, how in the world was she supposed to contact the avatar without putting up posters and revealing her identity to the entire world in the process?

Yet here he was, just a short distance off from where she sat.

Newfound hope in her veins, Ursa stood, heading off in the direction of the rest of the group as they crowded around the fire, the food cooking underneath it as they all waited eagerly for their food.

"Hey Akina," Katara said upon spotting her newfound friend nearing the fire. "I was just about to call you – the food is ready."

"Yes, but before eating I would like to make a small announcement." Ursa said, looking over at the rest of the group. All of them looked over in her direction curiously.

"What is it Akina?" Aang asked, his full attention placed on the woman before him. She was proving to be a nice distraction from the cooking meat over the fire.

Ursa stood up to her full height, her posture automatically righting itself so that she was standing with the same grace and elegance as that of her noble status.

"My name is not really Akina." She began.

The Fire Nation was currently ugly with all of the hate and destruction of War, however, what if there could be put a stop to that? This was a moment where the entire war would tilt.

"My name is Ursa, wife of Fire Lord Ozai, and Fire Lady of the Fire Nation."

**WHEW! That was sort of a toughie to write. I know I'm uploading this just a little after midnight, but I promised that I would have it up by Wednesday, so here it is. This was a challenge fic requested by t-rex989, and I hope that it met your expectations! I know that the sister's name is not actually Kira, however I couldn't remember her name from the episode so I just put in Kira as a substitute. She's only mentioned once or twice, which is why I was lazy and decided to simply ignore that little detail. Anyways thank you for reading, I hope you all liked it, and if you found some of it strange or weird, (or if you simply loved it, that's fine too /shot) then please tell me in a review, the button is right down there, all you have to do is click away! So, yeah. Bye! Please review!**

**LIA**


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